Am I being selfish to my family?

Ok I am 16 years old, I have 3 big brother and 2 younger sisters. Just over 18 months ago my mum was diagnosed with cancer and she was pretty much a single parent, my dad work on a boat and their relationship is on off. Anyway I never really got on well with my dad but he lost his job when my mum got ill, I never realised how much he drank and how violent he is. So our only income was from my two oldest brothers who are in the army.



I have full scholarship to private school and I hope to dance ballet professionally and to pay for class I work in the dance store and wash the mirrors in the studio. No money was ever handed over it's just an agreement between me and my teacher. In order to help with finances I have a part time job at McDonalds and my other brother is the same at a service station.



My mum is now improving and my dad has a job but he spends his wages on alcohol and my mum is now refusing to take any money from my 19 year old brother as he is going through a rough time out in Afghanistan and she doesn't want him to feel pressured into staying in the army because of us if he is still unhappy. So basically a full time position at McDonalds became available and my mum wants me to drop out of school and work full time. I do not get any money from what I earn, and so I will be stuck with no independence. And is it selfish of me to want more from my life than making greasy burgers in McDonalds? I want to dance and in case my dance career doesn't work I want to go to university I want to see the world. Is that selfish to put my future before my family? I think it's because i'm at private school and I see ambitious people doing so well with so many opportunities.



Am I wrong to want better in life? Please help

me, I want to do well in life! Is it my responsibility to provide for my family at 16 y/o???Am I being selfish to my family?
NO it is really not your responsibility to provide for your family but sometimes some people still have to do it. I didn't have to do it. My husband did though. His mom made him give up his paycheck at 17 to pay bills at their house...It's not fair I say....Anyway, sweetheart PLEASE don't drop out of school...Finish because you will have more money later by finishing school and having a degree. Working at McDonald's right now is okay but please don't make that your career. It will get you nowhere. Keep to your dreams and they will come true. Then at that time you will be able to help your parents out a lot and feel really good about it. They won't feel like they are using you either. As for your dad, he needs to grow up and be a real man. Also stop the abuse and the drinking...HE NEEDS HELP an intervention perhaps...Am I being selfish to my family?
Honestly i think ur mom is bein selfish, your friken 16 and she wants to stop school .... thats wrong, she got to finish y cant u , im sry that she has cancer but that gives her no reason for her to make u drop out, ur mom needs to relize u would make more money once u acually get a better job, the economy is stuff right now and theres not much we can do. So no u r not selfish :)
No, you are not selfish or wrong. Your mom is wrong for letting her sorry husband do this. You need to better your life for yourself as well as your brothers. I understand your younger sisters and would help where I could but working at McDonald's is not providing you a future.Am I being selfish to my family?
I don't think you are being selfish. What you could do is drop out of private school and attend a state school, or any free one. Whatever you do don't go to McDonalds. The government are trying to stop things like this happening (they are ensuring full time education until the age of 18 (this is in the UK)). I'd stay at school and even go to collage. The situation may be a little different in a couple years time when you go to university. If you still have the same problem you could work full time then, do a gap year. "Childhood is an excellent gift, what a shame it's wasted on children," some person. What I'm saying is don't waste your childhood days working, you've only got a couple more years left. Before all the taxes, mortgages, insurance and that trouble.
Id say the selfish one here is your mother. Theres no way you should drop school at 16. Thats crazy. Keep doing what youre doing and stay in school. If you drop out you'll be no better off when youre 30 than now when youre 16Am I being selfish to my family?
first lets drop the word selfish and consider you and your family as a whole. I wonder why mom don't take the job as the most important thing for all young people is to get a good education

You appear to have a good plan for you future and I will encourage you to stay with it.

Tell mom that the brother in the army can't spend his money over there and if he wants to help out he is in a better position than you to do so.
At 16, you do NOT have the responsibility for taking care of your family; your parents have the responsibility of taking care of YOU (and your minor sibs).



Your mother should take your father to court to force him to pay child support -- if he refuses, she can have it taken out of his paychecks, so he can't just drink it all away.



The 19 year old could make a LOT better pay with a job, than in the military, assuming he can find work.



But you're right. Your job now is to prepare yourself for your future. You need to finish school, and go to college. Dropping out of school would greatly hurt your chances for a decent life.