Job application help?

To Whom It May Concern:

My name is Timothy Glen Vaughan and I am applying for this job opportunity, because I believe that your business will be a great career opportunity for you as well as I. I like the friendly and helpful atmosphere of your business which has sadly has became a rarity. I believe that I bring many good qualities to the table that can be useful to your store as and that I can gain many things from this career opportunity.



I believe that I could handle the responsibilities whether it is as a stocker, cashier, or bag boy without many altercations. As I just said I would be happy with whatever openings you have at this time and will do the job with all of my effort. I was brought up to be a hard worker and not slack off. I have stayed active and helped the community through many clubs and organizations, I have been a member of 4-H, FFA, BPA, FCA, and have participated in chorus and football throughout my high school years.



As you will see from my resume, I have previous business experience from my time working for McDonalds. I have worked on farms since I was 12 (driving tractor, hauling hay, cut wheat, etc.) and thanks to these opportunities I have learned the meaning of hard work and will not show laziness in my work



I thank you for reading this and am hoping to hear from you soon on your decision. I can be reached by phone at: 580-555-5555 or by e-mail at

timmy_vaughan@yahoo.com

Thanks again for taking the time to read this



Sincerely

Timothy Glen Vaughan



please make suggestions and please be criticalJob application help?
Suggested changes:

Dear Sir/Madam,

Re : Application for the post of x

Para 1 : - don't need to introduce yourself. Say: I refer to the xx advertisement dated x and would like to apply for the above post.

Para2 : tell them about your qualifications and experience that would benefit them.

Para 3 : state what you can bring to the company.

Last para : yours is ok. Thanks for your time and consideration.



You may want to have a look at this and you can refer to other websites or books for cover letter samples.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cover_lette鈥?/a>

Remember not to use negative words in your letter: slack off, lazy. Stay positive. Good luck.